Broken parents, Wounded children

I have been seeing this in every therapy session of mine. It's either parent's unfulfilled needs & desires are expected to be met by the child or it's their guilt, feeling not good enough or abandonment issues are projected onto the child by being possessive, angry, high expectations, considering them your extension & wanting them to follow what you seem it's right.

I agree the child is an extension of you, they are still a whole individual, who has its dreams, needs & purpose to be fulfilled in this lifetime.

Every Parent wants to protect their child. While protecting they forget that same protection could also become a cage that a child will find ways to break or rebel. In many situations, the outcome is either parents have become abusive or the child has lost its direction. There is a balance in parenting, where the parent guides the child & also has healthy boundaries. This happens when the parent has addressed their deep-seated fears, guilt, shame, or any other root cause leading to unhealthy projection & expectations from the child. It's all about gathering those broken pieces to become the parent you wished you had & desire to be for your child.

Hope next time when you have any expectations from your child. Ask yourself "is this my projection & expectations from my child or this is what my child wants? ”

Anytime you are confused or feel forced in answering these questions. Take a step back & ask your child " What do you want/desire? " Give them time to reply. Be it a few minutes, hours, or days. This is a deep question, which will make them think. You need patience, that's what parenting is all about. Patience.

Find ways to heal yourself, so you don't have wounded children. This cycle needs to be broken, let that be the only broken thing in your relationships.

If you are looking to heal the wounded child in you. you can book your session here.

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